Thursday, January 3, 2019

let the hope you have light the road you're walking

HAPPY NEW YEAR everyone!

first night shift in 1 yr omg. chanced upon this song in my spotify playlist haha. so apt. 


on the FIRST day of new year, tagging eot call with one of the sweetest anes regs EVER (sidenote: being persuaded by multiple anes people to go study for my exam in between waiting for potential patients to do spinals on is very effective for study motivation. haha). and after feeling the spinous process i wanted to take the needlehub to mark the spot before going to scrub up for the spinal. and the anes reg says "its ok la. HAVE FAITH". in that moment i couldnt help but have the past 29 years flash past before my eyes and reminded of the reg's whatsapp profile pic which was a beautiful watercolor calligraphy of the verse "he makes everything beautiful in its time". i swear. that is her profile pic on whatsapp!! 

and no surprises there, i was successful with that lumbar puncture haha. 

driving home, rushing to my friend's wedding after with a rush of joy at the successful lumbar puncture, i realized that it has taken me 29 years and nearly pgy5 before i finally got it. HAVE FAITH. 

~

britt nicole - the sun is rising 

You're gonna make it
You're gonna make it
And the night can only last for so long
Whatever you're facing

There's a promise for the ones who just hold on
Lift up your eyes and see
And the sun is rising

Every high and every low you're gonna go through
You don't have to be afraid I am with you (I am with you)
Let the hope you have light the road you're walking

And even when you can't imagine how
How you're ever gonna find your way out
Even when you're drabbling in your doubt
Just look beyond the clouds

~

one more month. actually less than a month. NO IDEA HOW IM GONNA STUDY FOR THIS EXAM. 

have lots of faith, but also something tells me i must put in some effort too. its an old posting that we all know and love so well coming up, but also some new things, forms to fill, things to learn. expectations to fulfil. but no matter how high the expectations are and how many fiddly forms there are to fill, i shall be thankful to God for preparing me very well to go back to this place i love so much. He prepared me with icu experience, with intubation experience, with loads of resus practice with mcem tutorials with kind seniors who took time off on their days off 
or nights off or random weekends to come back and give us teachings. who didnt suan us for not knowing things or when we say things like "er... i will now call for help. *pause*. help". HAHAHAHAHA. (not me ok my friend! but it was so epically funny). an exciting toxicology simulation yesterday, where i fortuitiously studied organophosphate poisoning in my mcem b book right before going in and we got it as the scenario! i love doing simulation with my friends i practice for exams coz ... well, we have practiced tgt before so it flows much better. what can i say, practice makes purrfect


~

kutless's song "with you" never ever gets old - I know you and I, we can make it through make it through

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