Sunday, November 19, 2017

the answer



~

i am TOTALLY awed by the goodness of God. i woke up today half asleep after another busy shift ytd. and not to mention the exciting but stressful resus shift the day before that. anyway to sum up there are MANY THINGS stressing me out right now but anyway i somehow dragged myself out of bed to church and i wasnt really sure if God could hear me becos i have ALOT ALOT of prayers all the time and i think in my past God has alr answered many of my prayers and granted alot of miracles and i dunno whether one can run out of miracles? so i wasnt expecting too much but then i just prayed anyway hoping

so ANYWAY i literally just reached home and opened my email and i got an email out of the blue from my supervisor saying he will write a recletter for me and i didnt even ask him to! literally the temporal relationship was just.... JAW DROPPING. it's like God using my boss (who is btw a very devout christian) to tell me that IT IS GOING TO BE OKAY. like those pple in the flood and God keeps sending pple in the helicopters and boats to save them

THAT'S WHAT IT FELT LIKE.

so i dont know what is gonna happen and whether i can survive
a) tonight's night shift (probably but i will come out looking VERY SHAG and leave VERY LATE as usual, which is terrible since i havent packed my luggage..)
b) my presentation (for which i learnt r in ONE NIGHT)
c) my flight (pls God please help us be safe......)
d) the one million residency related apps thingy and also my posting appraisal
e) my next posting which i dont even know what it is, or even let's not talk abt residency apps, i long ago left it to God because it is toooo stressful to keep stressing abt it. lets put it this way. it has been like 3 yrs since i graduated. if God wants me to get it, i'm sure that he will work out a way. clearly his plans must be greater than mine. i know he has A PLAN, i knew that without a doubt the way i saw the mopex posting sghed. i just dont know the precise plan. well i hope he has a plan because I HAVE NO MORE PLANS c,d,e etc. except to fly off to join msf tmr. which is not a gd plan becos i want to have some more training becos i dont think i am very helpful right now to them. i can be more helpful with better training! i know it... 

ok to cut a long story short, i just know God is going to save me and i think He just sent His first boat to save me from not one year of the flood but YEARS OF FLOATING AROUND IN THIS FLOOD. and no i cant walk on water but thank God literally that He taught me how to swim
~

jeremy camp - the answer
So many questions, the world is reaching
So many hurting, so many lost
With all this thriving, who can we lean on?
Creations crying, out from the dark

I know the answer, to every question
The one solution, to every fear
I know my helper, where it comes from
Jesus, He is the answer

He sees our sadness, He feels our sorrow
And in our weakness, He is strong
He holds the weight of, all of our failings

Let every heart awaken
To see it's You who saves us
You are my help and the rock on which I stand
You are my helper, where it comes from
Jesus, You are the answer
~

jeremy camp - my defender

[Verse 1]
Though I walk through the valley of the shadow
And I stand face to face with the enemy
I will know that I am not forsaken
You surround me when the fire's at my feet

[Verse 2]
I can see You when the night is closing in
And I will trust You when it seems that there's no hope
And I hold tight to the promise You have given
'Cause this I know and I am confident

[Chorus]
You're my defender
You fight for me
I will remember
You're all I need
You are my healer
My remedy
Against the power of the unknown
And I will not stand alone
'Cause You're my defender

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