Wednesday, July 27, 2016

anchors/ starlight

Anchors are extremely important to the overall purpose and longevity of a ship.
When lowered, the anchor provides a ship with the ability to withstand the toughest of storms, enabling it to stay in place.
However, many miss the fact that in order for a ship to move along properly, that same anchor must eventually be lifted.
Every day, I have become more amazed at how we as believers have learned to trust God in where He has instructed us to lower our anchors, however (more often than not), refuse to hear from Him when He has instructed us to lift them back up.
Let’s face it: living a life with a lowered anchor is safe.
But living a life with a lifted anchor is not.
Our natural tendency as believers is to anchor down in times of uncertainty.
However, it takes extraordinary faith to become solely reliant on how our God decides to blow the wind. With only a few battered sails, and an old rudder of faith, there are times when we have to lean hard into the peace that can sometimes only be found in the middle of chaos.
It’s no wonder why so many of us have the number of barnacles we have attached to our lives. Many of us have become resistant to movement.
Dare to move your ship away from the shore.
Where you are today–you may have been there way too long.
“I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us” – Philippians 3:14 (NLT)
sometimes, no most of the time, it feels scary to be in a little boat with nothing but a rudder of faith to guide one
sometimes, i miss ce a lot, esp when dr ___ is on shift (who clearly loves it too & often reminisces with me abt ce stuff hahah). i actually dont think he actually knows how much my heart hurts when we talk about ce, but in a way, it's nice to talk to have someone to reminisce abt ce with :) i dont think there is anything wrong with missing ce. i missed edin too a lot initially and look how awesome nusmed turned out  (thanks primarily to my awesome cg heh)
there must be a reason God put me in this posting & directed me toward this path. however lasting or ephemeral it may be, i will trust that there is a reason. 
was at a friends wedding last weekend, telling nat abt my life choices recently and i swear i wasnt even sugarcoating it or anything & my naive enthusiasm has been throughly realitychecked after the traumatically busy monday shift lol. and she said "wow it really sounds like God is opening a door huh". :) thanks for the encouragement nat. you have no idea how much it helped. 
or the very nice pt who wrote me a compliment the other day. although i suspect the nurse also played a huge role as she also had three other compliments HAHA but anyway it was very nice. i dont expect much from work, certainly not compliments or being fantastic, just getting thru the shift without killing anyone or being killed is good enough for me. oh and setting plugs in record time is good too
i guess what i'm saying is that i am neither rudderless in the ocean nor naively head in the clouds idealistic. just trying to get thru this period of being super noob and trying to get better faster. trying to keep to whatever last shreds of ideals i may have had when i originally started out on this path. trying to always keep to the right path. hoping that one day i'll be good at this too :) 
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men. Colossians 3:23 (NIV)

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