really had to record this down before i forget
God, please help me to do the right thing no matter how difficult it sometimes may be.
isn't it funny how you can be in exactly the same spot, doing the same things as always, but it feels like a great weight is lifted off you? it feels like im back on the right path now :) & i'm quite sure that i'm going to stay on the path, thanks very much. sometimes it's just this really subtle feeling that something is off, nothing is going right, all your plans are falling apart and you're doing loads of things that you dont agree with & dislike to do & dont want to do anyway & ENNUI ++ versus the christmassy feeling (time of year notwithstanding) that all is right with the world, your sins are forgiven & everything is going to be okay?
& i know exactly what changed in between to shift the modes between the two. coz either way im just sitting here bumming on a usual weekend & watching tv anyway. haha. funny how mindsets work huh