1. 11 years ago on a maundy thursday is when i first knew of the existance of God. it was when they process out slowly, candle-bearers and all and bring the Blessed Sacrament to the upper room. truly absence makes the heart grow fonder. it's only when you DONT have something, that you realize the importance of it. the church even looks exactly the same after all these years so the minute i stepped out of the lift yesterday it hit me '11 years ago, this is how i knew there was a God".
fastforward 11 years, i'm actually quite a well adjusted happy bunny. well yea i still sometimes wonder what i'm going to do with my life when i grow up, and times when we feel very harrassed in the mo room and times when nurses physically drag us into their cubicle to order stuff for them. but overall i think all the random vicissitudes of life have kind of jaded me to the point that most things are like "well ok" & you just roll with the curveballs & do whatever they want you to do. the funny thing about life is that things you expect to be slack actually tend to have a lot of hidden difficulties in them, and things you dreaded like difficult postings actually turn out to be very memorable and happy and satisfying. like surg onco!
and of course, the miracles in these 11 years have been nothing short of amazing. easter has for some reason featured very prominently in this, not really sure why. but in general, i guess ~spring and new beginnings is always something happy & to look forward to. the idea that there is light at the end of the darkness, that when it seems like something is over, it's actually not, is one of the greatest blessings in life. im not the sort to evangelise actually, but i really do believe that our faith is incredibly special because of how it's predicated on this.
from spiritualinspiration.tumblr.com :)
Every year all over the world, people honor Good Friday as the day Jesus was crucified. It was the darkest, most painful, discouraging day of His life. To others, it looked as if it was over. It looked as if His enemies had gotten the best of Him. But God had other plans. Jesus’ enemies put Him in the grave on Friday, celebrating their victory, but Sunday morning was a different story. The grave could not hold Him. Death couldn’t contain Him. The forces of darkness couldn’t stop Him. On the third day, Jesus came out of the grave and said, “I was dead, but now I am alive forevermore.”
One principle that the resurrection teaches us is that God will always finish what He started. No matter how dark it looks, no matter how long it’s been, no matter how many people are trying to push you down; if you will stay in faith, God will always take you from Friday to Sunday. You will see your day of breakthrough because God will complete what He started.
If you are going through a dark time today, remember that your day of resurrection, your “Sunday,” is on the way! Keep standing, keep believing because soon you will rise up and embrace the victory He has in store for you!
2. on buddies: one of the best things about being a ho is really fellow hos. i cant even begin to describe the feeling of having a buddy in a busy ward. and who can forget the epic first week of work in our entire lives, with junheng and co LOL. the camaraderie commiserating with fellow hos is really priceles. lh and i were angsting away in the mo room ytd then we realized the coder was there LOL. coder "ive been here in this room for many yrs and all the hos who have passed thru this ward are equally angsty. its like that one" pwahaha i nearly died of laughter. SO different from the chillaxing in last week's ward (where my co ho literally took 1 hr to hids 1 pt and fell asleep multiple times during that).
3. on debate: reading my old webjournals, i conclude that fourteen year olds tend to be extremely inmature, especially when they are very stressed about debate. that was probably also the peak of my debating techical skills HAHA. nowadays we all keep getting called to do comedy debates. for that matter they keep calling me to do debates too. usually these calls come postcall. LOL. sometimes i think it might be His way of showing me one can do medicine AND debate, but its hard to do law and be a doctor too. (not impossible though!) also kind of a compensation for allll that angst about debate. i think medlaw was the peak though. the 2 guys were the most hilarious & best teammates of all time. sometimes i still flashback to the serendipitiously captured pic of the exact moment when we won and our surprised faces :):) a million dollars couldnt buy that moment in a lifetime. i have yet moreee debates coming up. somehow being a ho on repeated night floats doesnt really predispose one to thinking up pithy comedic one-liners, but behold we shall dredge them up! at an undetermined time. very hopefully before 11th april. haha
2 more days to easter sunday! :)
random snippets of musings 1. i usually love poetry but the apocalyptic poetry felt... depressing for some reason. maybe the thing about th...
2nd last day of ent tmr! it has actually been quite a pleasant experience things i've seen reccently - BPPV [with the rotatory geotro...
be strong in the lord and/ never give up hope/ you're gonna do great things/ i already know/ God's got his hand on you so/ dont...
Every anxious thought that steals my breath It's a heavy weight upon my chest As I lie awake and wonder what the future will hold Help ...