& yes, i realise there is an extremely religious theme running through this. i guess suffering is good if it draws one closer to God haha. even if one purposely signed up for this suffering knowing what one was getting oneself into. and it is great fun, at times (usually on hindsight). and it's definitely made more bearable by pithy quotes and pretty pictures. and definitely made more bearable with fellow journeymen (like when k suddenly appeared to help me with an abg on christmas eve. i never felt such relief ever before). haha.
jan - He has made everything beautiful in its time/ whatever this year holds, let me bring great glory to you
feb - truly inspiring. to be able to use your God-given skills to bring more years of life to people
march - God has you in the palm of his hand. he has never once failed before, the the good news is, he is not about to start now
april - “My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.”
may - there are many things i don't know. but this i know, that this year of my life will only be turned to good. / My God turns my darkness into light
June - so this is the third call in my entire life. it's still nerve wracking. possibly it gets nerve wracking the more it goes. not more comfortable the more it goes.
July - around 530am i set a plug for a kid with ba who needed abx but plug site swollen. (you really really hate to hear these words over the phone at 5am) after that i felt that i did something good with my life for once.
August - 11th and last ever paeds HO call was ho1 on my home ground!! beautiful LP rounding off my paeds HO posting. NO RBCs in the LP at all!!
September - Heavenly Father, thank you for placing this dream in my heart. Thank you for this passion. Thank you for the desire to use my gift to bring glory to you... I know what you have planned for my life, no man can stop... give my strength to complete my asssignment and one day hear 'Job well done' from you.
October - "You have listened to fears, child,” said Aslan. “Come, let me breathe on you. Forget them. Are you brave again?"
— C.S. Lewis, Prince Caspian
Nov - on my rare free off days, there really isnt anything nicer than simply just bumming. with music and dreaming of wintery holidays & warm food. there's always hundreds of things to do & missed calls. there's always a call tomorrow and surgery looming ahead
for now, i'll take a breather, however momentarily, from the neverendin mental to do lists
Dec - at some point my vision changed from NEUROSURGEON and DOCTORS WITHOUT BORDERS to God i will do anything as long as i'm a doctor, wherever you send me i will go, i dont have to be an award-winning world famous neurosurgeon like ben carson (much as i admire him), any area of medicine that when it finally all ends, you can say to me 'i was hungry and you gave me food; i was thirsty and you give me drink. i was a stranger and you took me in... i was sick and you visited me'