Sunday, October 17, 2010

malassezia furfur is sucha cute name. but it causes a notsocute diease called tinea versicolor - white patches all over the skin. the alternative name is pityriasis, which is rather more apt than furfur.

~

i'm sitting in the same seat in the library computer room i always sit in, but the things i feel are nearly a 180degree change. i don't worry any longer about finding a place in the world, i don't feel frustrated at studying the same things over again (we've gone so much further off track that i feel i'm now exploring mars). The other day I told hanyu "I think I might actually fail" "No la you won't!" me *dangling the set of notes on parasitology* "eR, looking at this, actually YEAH i might..." And I hadn't even so much as looked at it yet. Eurgh. Strangely enough, the feeling of inadequacy and needing to conquer information is... empowering. I have found solid ground :) I also have only three weeks until my first exam. I feel horror and stress, but it's something I'm USED to, yknow? I like this feeling in an odd way.

So I think, what I have to do is different now. I no longer have this big barrier between me and making a difference in the world, I don't have to worry so much about my obligations, cos I HAVE NONE LEFT. It's SUCH a relief you have no idea. I need to start doing things to Give Back. And I will.

after i finish mugging coccidioidomycosis. zzzzzz

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Through the fire