Tuesday, November 3, 2009

human beings fascinate me. and looking back, i think the inevitable was inevitable. everything seems to have been written in stone right from the beginning. or heh benefit of hindsight ;p

maybe i shouldnt have prayed everything would be ok. it's ok, yeah, as in dull & boringly so. it's ok in the sense that there's generally an absence of something, not someone asking you questions you don't want to answer, or telling you things you don't want to hear. it's ok in the sense that you don't have the burning urge to do anything. but you know there's a hundred things you can't do, people you have no right to love. scabs that never fully healed being undone again; and you give up utterly.

not comforting at all to know it was never yours. there are lots of things that aren't mine, but best not to think about them. surely, the dust will settle, even on boringness. or should i say, i'm sure life will become interesting again ;p it just feels quiet and echo-ey, having managed to quell all the tempests, calm the billows. i shouldn't. i don't want to have to. but at least being in stasis beats knowing that you will self-destruct spontaneously anytime soon and the fuse lies in someone else's hand. maybe one day i'll tell you, just not for, oh, a few forevers.

No comments:

Post a Comment

garage gym

random snippets of musings 1. i usually love poetry but the apocalyptic poetry felt... depressing for some reason. maybe the thing about th...